I had a mild victory today: Today I was a lil early for my therapy appointment, and so I was waiting outside for her to arrive.  At this time a slew of kids (your garden variety junior high types) came swarming out of the library to head back to school, which is just up the hill.  

Here they come.  
I can do two things here:
Duck into the doctor's office one door down or just stand there and suck it up.

I chose the latter.  And it turns out there was nothing to it anyway -- some smiled and some increased their pace.  *shrug*  I was ready for a "You're fat" comment, to which I could reply, "Have you thoroughly researched your hypothesis or was that just an educated guess?"  And this could go on forever where I ask them to document and write up a report.  But not a thing and ya know what occurred to me?  It really didn't matter and I really didn't care.

On another message board, a gal was talking about how some men (highly insecure men) preferred obese women because of "our" low self-esteem.  She then said that every pound she lost, she could feel the self-esteem rising.  But I don't see myself in her category.  Yes I'm an extremely obese woman, but I also have self-esteem out the wazoo -- at times a bit too much.  And I believe it's important to recover the self-esteem before starting this journey -- not just WLS, but any kind of weightloss.  

Most obese people have suffered through this most of their lives and especially during childhood, meaning quite a few were withdrawn and never experienced much of the adolescent sexual awakening (with someone other than themselves), rebellion or just the social aspect of conversing with their fellow peers.  The danger here lies in the fact that when these folks lose weight, in a sense, they'll experience a second puberty -- unfortunately this time there's no authority figure to set limits.   So after so many years of starvation, the appetite becomes insatiable.   

No no, the doctor hasn't called back.  Mother finally got tired and plowed through everyone till they put her through to the doctor, who was so incredibly accommodating it was obvious he was wetting them.  My theory is he must recall Mother's line of work and he fears she has a nuclear bomb aimed at his anus, and she can press that button anytime she likes.

On the plus side, I did have the pleasure of driving by the masturbating horse.  Oh that naughty horse.  Down the road a piece there's a house with a big corral right by the road.  They occasionally go out there and rope up some cattle, and always there's a horse or two when ya drive by.  Well a couple weeks ago while driving by Mother pointed out, "Hey look at that horse, he's rubbin his belly."  I turned to see this horsey straddling a pole and indeed rubbing himself.  I turned to Mother, "Either that or getting his jollies." Mother gasps, "You don't really think he was doing that, was he?"  "Well his stomach should be higher up than that."  After laughing Mother replies, "Oh my God!  I just saw a masturbating horse!"

It's Mother's birthday tomorrow and she wanted to go out and celebrate.  So we went to what used to be our favorite restaurant -- it was changed into an "Asian fusion" restaurant.  We were skeptical at first and certainly crestfallen that they'd dare take The Paradiso from us, still John Pisto can do no wrong (Infamous chef in Monterey who owns numerous restaurants around here -- makes the most divine creme brulee). Turned out it was the same menu with a sushi bar added and different interior.  Shhh!  Don't tell anyone!

A sweetie of a waitress came by to share the specials:  Scampi Prawns in a garlic and wine sauce with rice and sundried tomatoes; Scampi Prawns in a garlic and wine sauce with linguine; Scampi Prawns in a Thai Red Curry sauce; Seared and Sesame Crusted Ahi Tuna Sashimi style; and a Stuffed Salmon Filet with crab, spinach, artichokes and parmesan topped with hollandaise sauce and served with asparagus.  After this she had to wipe the drool off my face.  I picked the Salmon, but it was a tough choice.

Also, despite my declaration of going teetohal for a year, I desperately wanted booze, and they just happened to have my favorite wine Gewurztraminer (Yes I had to look that one up, who the hell could spell that?)  I call it Gert for short.  Anyways I asked Mom if I should and she thought it was alright if I just sipped at it.  I drank about 3/4's of a glass and found it quite comical that I was already looped, but I never had any trouble with it.  

I nibbled away at my salmon, possibly devouring only a quarter of the filet, but I believe I enjoyed it much more than I would have pre-surgery.  Pre-op I just wolfed everything down, now with the constant need for chewing I can really relax and enjoy all the complex flavors.  Of course it does look weird, big huge gurl barely ate a damn thing.  We asked to have it boxed up for Dad and my Mother pointed out I had WLS and couldn't eat that much.  Both parents do this, but it really never bothers me -- if she had asked I would've told her anyway.

It was very nice and relaxing -- we saw a few seals and wondered how those guys out on the lil boat with no light were gonna get home.  We also contemplated that if there was a blackout, they'd probably wet 'em, but it was ok since they were on the ocean.