Look at this!  I looked great at a size 18.

Anyways Art and Artifact occasionally make reproductions of famous dresses from movies or different eras.

Now Maid in Manhattan is a miserable movie that doesn’t deserve repeating, even though Ralph Fiennes starred in it; someday I plan on forgiving him.  What was the only redeeming quality of Maid in Manhattan?  That dress, and wouldn’t ya know it; Art and Artifact recreated the dress and started sellin it.  However I couldn’t justify $450, including the damn shawl, for a dress that would forever be sequestered away in my closet and never worn.  

BUT!

A couple weeks ago I was browsing their clearance section and there was my dress marked down to nearly $100.  So yes the infamous dress is now in my possession, and at a size 18 it is mildly attainable. 

I can’t believe I’ve lived my life this long without the genius that is South Park.  Now that it’s syndicated I’m forever rambling on about the many jokes until people tell me, “Yes I know, I’ve seen that episode five times already AND I told you about it.”

“I know, but I only pay attention to the things you say that I’m interested in.”  

So it’s all new to me and I love it.  

Chef: Yes, is this customer service? I'm havin' problems with my new television. It sprouted legs and guns 'n started walkin' around shootin' people.

Cartman: Give me your Jew gold Kyle

Stan: We've tried everywhere! Butters, are you absolutely sure we can't go to your house??
Butters: I'm sure! there's no way!
Kyle:    Uh why not?!
Butters: Uh because! Uh my parents are out of town, and I don't have a babysitter.
Cartman: Oh, God-damnit you better be kidding!
Butters: No! I really dont have a babysitter. That's why I'm stayin' at Stan's.
Kyle: This whole time your TV is in a house with nobody in it?!
Stan: Come on, let's just go! We'll kill Butters later!

Kyle: Wow! That's a lot of seamen, Cartman.
Cartman: Yeah, I bought all that I could at this bank, and then I got the rest from this guy Ralph in an alley.
Stan: That's cool.
Cartman: Yeah, and the sweet thing is, the stupid asshole didn't even charge me money for it. He just made me close my eyes and suck on a hose.

Jewish Kid: Is anyone else having problems concentrating on this? I just can't seem to concentrate.
Cartman: Maybe we should send you to a concentration camp.

Chef: Hello there, children.
Stan: Chef! What would a priest want to stick up my butt?
Chef: Goodbye.

Cartman: Butters will give handjobs in the corner for a dollar.
Butters: Sure, I'm good at all sorts of jobs.

Cartman: [strokes the lamb and sets it aside] Hello, Precious. Yes, that's a good Precious. [grabs a basket with a bottle of lotion sitting inside and lowers it down a hole in the basement. The basket stops when it reaches Polly Prissy Pants, which sits at the bottom of the hole] Now it takes the lotion from the basket.
Polly Prissy Pants: [Cartman voicing] Oh please, mister. Please let me out of here.
Cartman: It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.
Poodle: [Cartman voicing] Bark bark bark bark!
Cartman: Yes, that's a good Precious. Okay, now it puts the lotion back in the basket.
Polly Prissy Pants: Please, mister, let me out.
Cartman: It puts the lotion back in the basket!
Polly Prissy Pants: I miss my Mom, mister. I wanna see my Mommy-
Cartman: Put the lotion in the fuckin' basket!
Kyle: What the hell are you doing?
Cartman: We’re playing lambs


The last is my favorite to use around people, places and things that just happen to be annoying me at the moment, “If you don’t stop we’re going to have to play lambs.”  Then I push them into the nearest and most convenient bottomless pit and holler down, “It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again.”  

I get to go see someone today.  I promise to tell you all more about it.  It’s just right now I have that stupid superstition; if I blurt it out, then I’ll be cursed for all eternity and it will never come to pass.  And that would make me really cranky.  I’m hoping it’ll be official inna few days.  Fingers crossed and stuff.

Remember when I was going off about Feline Immunodeficiency Virus or FIV, and how little is known about the disease to the layman.  So a poor cat that’s FIV+, even though he’s in perfect health, gets passed by thanks to his scarlet letters.

BUT!

Someone adopted a FIV+ lil boy this weekend.  Wanna see?




The following boy I went to visit in person.  As gorgeous as his picture is, it does not do him justice.  He is one big beautiful cat and sweet as he can be.