I come from a long line of Goddamn hobbits.  Standing at nearly 5’2”, I’m the tallest of them all, and that’s purty sad.  Besides your obvious inconveniences like never being able to reach a damn thing, EVEN if you’re standing onna ladder; you gain weight so incredibly easy.  

Amazingly, underneath this mass of fat, I have small bones.  Seriously, I have the tiniest feet and hands; people just go on and on about them.  

Take a 6’2” individual: This person could easily eat between 2000 and 2500 calories a day and never gain an ounce.  While midgets like me must stay between 1000 and 1200 calories to keep from gaining.  

Now reaching upwards of 430 pounds was certainly a feat for me, but…  Let’s go back to that 6’2” individual: How much do you believe they had to consume onna daily basis to reach 615 pounds?  They literally would have had to eaten one gingerbread house per day; that’s a Hansel and Gretel life size gingerbread house.  Of course back in my day I knew how to inhale great quantities of food, but I’m purty sure I never reached THAT level of gluttony.

To maintain 430 pounds with my frame and height I needed a daily calorie intake of 2500.  For the 6’2” individual to maintain they’re strapping 615 pounds, they needed a daily calorie intake of 4500.

Must be nice to be tall.